Guest blog by: Katie Jay, MSW; Certified Life & Wellness Coach Taking care of your health after bariatric surgery can feel overwhelming. It’s not uncommon to hear people say, “It’s a lot.” And they’re right. You know you should be taking iron, but you don’t have time to pick it up at the pharmacy. You want to eat better, but exhaustion keeps you from cooking. Then, out of nowhere, your best friend moves away. You feel sad, frustrated—and before you realize it, you’ve eaten a row of cookies and made yourself sick. The responsibilities that come with bariatric surgery can feel daunting, and when life gets heavy, self-care is often the first thing to slip. But what if you could lighten the load? The Weight You Carry Imagine your job in life is to swim across a fast-moving river while carrying a bag of rocks—your daily responsibilities. Even under the best conditions, crossing that river is hard. Add a heavy bag of rocks, and it becomes nearly impossible. Before surgery, you likely carried a full load—your own responsibilities and, perhaps, those of others. After surgery, you added even more: Buying and remembering to take vitamins and supplements Monitoring labs and staying active Drinking enough water and eating enough protein Navigating food triggers and social situations Watching your weight and fighting urges to graze Adjusting to a new self-image and changing relationships With everything you carried before surgery—plus the added responsibilities afterward—you may find yourself overwhelmed, struggling to manage it all. This can leave little time for rest, self-care, and meeting your bariatric needs. The added burdens of bariatric surgery make it critical for you to reevaluate the number and size of the rocks you carry. Reevaluating Your Responsibilities To get the most out of your surgery, you must take a realistic look at your obligations. If you’re constantly taking on extra responsibilities—like picking up the slack at work, volunteering because no one else will, or baking for a friend’s party—you might be carrying rocks that aren’t yours to bear. Carrying too many rocks is risky. And if you’re struggling to keep up with your own needs while also shouldering others’ burdens, you may be at risk of sinking. Three Things to Remember If you want to stay afloat, keep these three things in mind: 1. Everyone carries rocks, but those who manage them well set boundaries, value themselves, and recognize their limits. 2. Taking on someone else’s rocks—when they’re capable of carrying them—doesn’t help you or them. 3. Bravely choosing which rocks to carry (and which to let go) will help you meet your bariatric needs and bring more rewards than you can imagine. Giving Yourself Permission to Say No You don’t have to do everything others expect of you. You have the power to make choices that support your health. You can choose not to dine at a restaurant that triggers you to overeat. You can ask whomever you’re living with to not bring tempting snacks into the house (or at least to hide them in a high cabinet). You can decline to run an errand for a friend if it interferes with your self-care routine. You can say NO. The river will rage in your life, and you must do everything you can to stay afloat. There’s only one way—drop the rocks that threaten to pull you under, especially the ones that were never yours to carry.