Guest blog by: Katie Jay, MSW; Certified Life & Wellness Coach As a 20-year bariatric surgery veteran, I’ve learned that success after weight loss surgery requires stepping back from time to time to see the big picture. After my surgery, I tried to be perfect. In my first year, almost without fail, every day I: Drank 64 ounces of water Consumed 80 grams of protein (mostly from protein drinks) Walked for an hour (I had to work my way up to that) Did weight training Tracked everything But by year two, I realized my perfectionism and strict protocol weren’t enough. For one, I couldn’t follow the protocol perfectly, despite my best efforts. And second, life kept throwing challenges my way—some like a Category 1 hurricane and others as intense as a Category 5. If your boat gets rocked or you get lost on your journey, remember bariatric surgery is not a pass-or-fail test. It's a challenging process that requires stepping out of your comfort zone, looking at the bigger picture, and understanding that bariatric surgery is not a cure. Physical protocols alone are not enough; your entire environment matters. Here are the five essentials for bariatric surgery success (try to keep an open mind—they truly are essential): 1. Your “Head Game” Matters What you habitually think, feel, and believe has a significant impact on your success. For example, if I’m always telling myself I can’t control my eating, I might not try hard enough to overcome the problem because I’ve already decided it’s hopeless. You can see how self-defeating that kind of thinking can be. Learn to take ownership of your thought life; identify and release long-held, self-sabotaging beliefs; and pay attention to what you say about yourself—to yourself and to others. 2. Food Choices Matter Foods can affect your energy, emotions, and even physical pain. The key is observing how different foods impact you personally. With curiosity (not judgment), track your energy levels, pain, and emotions. Over time, you will learn how what you eat affects you and can make adjustments to your diet. You can also be heavily influenced by other people when it comes to your food choices, so black-belt boundary-setting is an art worth learning. Finally, because your food choices will be gloriously imperfect, develop the habit of getting back up every time you fall—even when you get tired of doing it. And use the trash can! Really, I mean it. 3. Consistency Matters When it comes to exercise or any new self-care habit, consistency is more important than intensity. When it comes to food choices, consistency can help you learn to depend on yourself and believe you can take care of yourself, even when your boat gets rocked. 4. Risk-Taking Matters It's true: if you don't change, nothing will change. You may have an aversion to change because it’s uncomfortable and therefore stressful. Choose to embrace discomfort anyway. In fact, value discomfort as a way of life and intentionally work to increase your tolerance for it. Tell yourself, “When I’m uncomfortable, I know I’m growing.” One important skill to develop, so you can handle the intensity of risk-taking, is acknowledging your fear and anxiety—and learning how to work with it. There are many ways to do this if you’re willing to experiment a bit. 5. Being "in" Your Body Matters If you want to accelerate your healing, learn to communicate and connect with your body. Many people find this idea intimidating and may feel an aversion to it. Start slow. Read a book about it. Take a yoga class. Notice your breathing—you don’t have to control it, just observe it. Pay attention to how your stomach feels after meals. Notice where you hold tension in your body. Over time, you can learn to be present with yourself, practice self-empathy, and take loving care of your body. By focusing on these essentials, you’ll find that your relationship with yourself and your body will gradually improve, allowing love and compassion to find an opening they never had before.